The Day Red Rover Taught Me About Being Chosen

“Red Rover, Red Rover, let Lucas come over!” Head down, he took off as fast as he could. As he approached our line, he looked up at me with a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. He was my boyfriend, and I knew he chose to run toward me, thinking I would let him break our chain and take me back to his team. I had a decision to make: Do I let him break the chain, or do I stand my ground and not let him in?

Determination in both of our eyes, I gripped my teammate’s hand even tighter. I was not about to let him take me captive. I was loyal to my team. A few yards away Lucas quickened his pace, but to his surprise he did not break the chain, he stood there stunned. His teammates laughed as he ran to the far end of the playground.

After a few more rounds, the game ended, and I went searching for him. I found him hunched over on the eagle’s nest. As quiet as a mouse, I slipped up on him and asked why he ran off. When he looked up at me, I saw the hurt in his eyes.

He felt betrayed by me. When his friends laughed at him for not being able to break through the chain, he felt rejected. He wanted to be a winner and bring someone over. He wanted to belong—to fit in—to be accepted.

Some of us have been betrayed. Many of us have felt rejected. The heartache and hurt are the same, though some are more pronounced than others. Let me encourage you today with these truths:

Jesus was betrayed by one of His closest friends.

Jesus was rejected by one of His friends in his inner circle.

Jesus has chosen us, even when we feel like outcasts.

Betrayed

Unfortunately, part of life is being betrayed, and often we learn this at an early age. At some point in our lives, we will be betrayed by a sibling who rats us out to our parents, or by a friend.

Trust is lost. Feelings of anger, hurt, loneliness, and resentment swirl within us, and we have to learn to deal with these emotions. How deep the betrayal often determines how long it takes us to move on.

Fortunately, we have a friend we can count on, one who knows exactly how it feels to be betrayed. On the night of the Passover meal, Jesus told his disciples that he would be betrayed: “When Jesus had said this, he was troubled in his spirit and testified, ‘Truly I tell you, one of you will betray me’” (John 13:21–28, CSB).

Matthew, one of Jesus’s disciples, gives an account of Jesus’s betrayal in the Garden of Gethsemane. Judas left the meal, went to the Sanhedrin, and led them to Jesus. Upon arrival, Judas kissed Jesus on the cheek.

I imagine Judas saw the hurt in Jesus’s eyes as he leaned in to kiss His cheek. I believe Jesus also saw the hurt in Judas’s eyes. Judas was hurt because Jesus wasn’t who he thought he would be. He believed Jesus was the Messiah who would establish the Israelites (the Jews) as a ruling nation and finally defeat the Romans.

Jesus’s response right after his betrayal is astonishing. He replied, “Friend, why have you come?” (Matt. 26:50, CSB). Did you catch that? In the moment of betrayal, Jesus calls Judas friend. In the very next verse, we see our friend Peter’s reaction: he drew a sword and cut off the ear of one of the high priest’s servants.

Have you ever allowed your emotions to get the best of you?

I have.

I have exploded at family and friends who have hurt me. In moments like these, we have a choice to make. Are we going to respond calmly, or cut someone with our words? Betrayal hurts, but we are to be slow to anger.

Even when we feel alone or hurt from betrayal or rejection, we can still have peace in our hearts because we are chosen. https://www.freepik.com/

Rejected

Some might say the hurt from betrayal is nothing compared to the feeling of being rejected. The same feelings of anger, bitterness, hurt, and loneliness can swirl in our minds. These circling thoughts can drop us into a pit of isolation.

I can’t tell you how many times I would isolate myself and stew on those feelings. Each feeling led me further into the pit. The more I focused on my feelings, the angrier I became. Then bitterness toward the offender would grow, and I would decide that being a friend was not worth the hurt. This is exactly what the devil wants. He wants us to focus on ourselves.

This reminds me of when Jesus was tempted by the devil. Jesus went to the desert to spend time with God. The devil waited to appear to Jesus at the end of His time in the wilderness, when He was alone, hungry, and tired.

Satan tempted Jesus three times, and each time Jesus responded with Scripture. Jesus gives us the perfect example of how we should respond to negative thoughts when we have been rejected. Isolation is not the answer; community is.

Jesus wants to know whether we will choose to follow Him.

Chosen

We are all looking for acceptance—to be chosen by someone. Jesus has already chosen us. Jesus tells Peter in John 13:9 that He knows the ones He has chosen. Peter later writes to “those who are chosen” in 1 Peter, explaining that Jesus is our living hope, how they should live as His chosen people, and what to expect as followers of Christ.

My friend, I am here to tell you that you are chosen. But much like the decision I had to make in Red Rover, you have a decision to make. Are you going to allow Jesus to take your heart captive, or are you going to tighten your grip and not let Him in?

The choice is ours. We can loosen our grip and be on Jesus’s team, or we can tighten our grip and not let Him into our lives. When we let Him in, our lives will change. We will start acting differently, talking differently, and thinking differently. Most of the time it doesn’t happen overnight, but over time you will see a difference. He is a gentleman and will honor our decision.

Whose team do you want to be on?

• Team Jesus
• Team Satan

Check Our Hearts: Questions for Reflection

We can check our hearts with the following questions:

• When we are hurt, do we react emotionally?

• Are we holding on to any negative feelings toward ourselves or others?

• Are we willing to humble ourselves, accept God’s gift of grace, and surrender our lives to him?